Mostafa Malekian's Lecture: 'Success or Satisfaction; Integrity or Self-Betrayal?!'

With the distinction I am about to make, a great part of mystical ethics and a great part of the counsels of the sages of history become more comprehensible to us, and that distinction is this. In general, human beings can be divided into two groups. Of course, I am presenting this division in an extreme form so that we can situate ourselves within it; otherwise, whichever of these two categories we fall into, we sometimes show an inclination toward the other category as well. But in order to clarify the matter, I am presenting it in a very sharp and decisive manner. Broadly speaking, it can be said that all of us in life are either seeking success or seeking satisfaction.

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Lecture

Success or Satisfaction; Integrity or Self-Betrayal?![1]

Mostafa Malekian

To spend a moment with sorrow, the whole world is not worth.

Sell our patched cloak for wine, for it is not worth more than this.

In the street of wine-sellers, they won't take him for a cup,

Bravo to the prayer-rug of piety, which is not worth a single goblet.

My rival reproached me, saying turn your face from this door,

What has befallen this head of ours, that the dust of the door is not worth?

Wash away this design of melancholy, for in the market of integrity,

Patchwork cloaks of many colors are not worth red wine.

The splendor of the royal crown, in which fear for one's life is embedded,

Is a charming hat, but not worth abandoning one's head for.

How easy the sea's sorrow seemed at first, with the scent of profit,

I was wrong, for this storm is not worth a hundred pearls.

It is better for you to hide your face from the eager,

For the joy of world-conquest is not worth the sorrow of an army.

Like Hafez, strive for contentment and pass by the base world,

For one grain of obligation to the base is not worth two hundred measures of gold.

In the ghazal that was recited, contentment and integrity were alluded to. With regard to the distinction I am about to make, a great part of mystical ethics and a great part of the counsels of the sages of history become more comprehensible to us, and that distinction is this. Generally speaking, human beings can be divided into two groups. Of course, I am presenting this division in an extreme form so that we may situate ourselves within it; otherwise, whichever of these two categories each of us falls into, we sometimes show an inclination toward the other category as well. But in order to clarify the matter, I am presenting it in a very sharp and decisive manner. Broadly speaking, it can be said that all of us in life are either seeking success or seeking satisfaction. These two concepts may be somewhat ambiguous for friends; but they will become clear with explanation, and once they become clear with explanation, it may be possible to use two other concepts in place of these two, both of which appear in Hafez. That is, we must see whether the 'success' and 'satisfaction' I speak of can be accommodated within the two concepts of 'self-betrayal' and 'integrity' or not. The market of self-betrayal is on the other side, as we have in Hafez, and we also had integrity in this verse: Wash away this image of constriction, for in the market of integrity... . I think these two terms are expressive; but since I began the discussion with the two terms success and satisfaction, I will address those terms later. Sometimes the discussion revolves around this, and some of us human beings are such that we observe what things people in society value positively and we compile a list of them, which usually boils down to those seven things I have repeatedly spoken and written about. That is, the positive values that people hold in society, if we examine them carefully, ultimately and finally come back to these seven things: wealth, power, status and position, social prestige, fame, popularity, and knowledge. Meaning scholastic knowledge, the knowledge of the school, the madrasa, and the university, and so on. This is a list that we refer to as the 'list of individual social desirables.' Meaning desirables that are desirable within the vessel of social life, and if they are attained, they are attained for the individual. For example, if wealth is attained, it is attained for me or for so-and-so. However, from this perspective, these are called social desirables because as long as social life does not exist, none of these can be attained. But when they are attained within the vessel of social life, they are attained for individuals. This is different from 'collective social desirables,' which are attained within the vessel of social life and, when attained, are attained for the whole of society, which are: security, welfare, justice, and freedom. These four desirables also emerge within the vessel of social life; but when they emerge, they emerge for everyone. Friends should note that welfare is different from wealth. Wealth is a characteristic of the individual. It is possible that this gentleman is wealthy and I am not. I am wealthy and the gentleman is wealthier. But welfare is an attribute of society. For instance, they say Danish society is an affluent society, but Bangladeshi society is not an affluent society. In any case, security, welfare, freedom, and justice are not the subject of my discussion. These seven desirables, which are social-individual, are the subject of discussion. First, I will address the first category:

1. The People of Success: The people of success take three steps:

Step one: If I compile a list of these individual social desirables, which, for example, amounts to these seven, this becomes step one.

Step two: Since I see that these seven desirables are valued in the eyes of the people, I too begin to acquire these seven, or six, or at least one of these seven. Because I see that the society in which I live values these seven things, and I say to myself, let me not be deprived of these seven or some of these seven, so that through not being deprived of them, I too may be considered a successful person in the eyes of the people. In the eyes of the people, someone is successful who is either wealthy, or powerful, or has status and position, or social prestige, or fame, or popularity, or academic knowledge, or...

Step three: This is that since, when I pursue these seven desirables, the other members of society are also pursuing these seven, I always see myself theoretically comparing myself with the rest of the people in several of these seven, and practically in a state of competition. This theoretical comparison and practical competition is step three.

I take these three steps. So the first step is that I list the social and individual desirables for myself; the second step is that, in order to be considered respectable and successful in people's eyes, I go after acquiring one, two, or three of these; and the third step is that, since others are also after one, two, or three of these, well, I always see myself as their rival and am always thinking of myself, comparing myself with them, and in practice, I see myself in a race. Because, after all, every country has only one president; so if you become president, naturally I am deprived of the presidency, and vice versa. Therefore, there is also a competition. Those who go through these three steps, whether consciously or unconsciously, lead a life that is in pursuit of social success. In fact, because they see success in such matters, and society is a society that considers a successful person to possess one of these components, it is as if they are always adorning themselves to appear good and beautiful in people's eyes. From this perspective, it can be said that they are all in the position of prostituting themselves. A female prostitute, a male prostitute always wants to appear beautiful in the eyes of their clients and therefore seeks ways not to lose their beauty and good figure and to present themselves as more beautiful and shapely than they really are. Well, this pursuit of having people consider me more successful, respect me in the assembly, seat me at the head of the gathering, and honor me, leads me to do this. Hence, these people fall into the pursuit of success.

2. The People of Satisfaction

There is a second group for whom it is not at all important to appear good and beautiful in people's eyes. These people seek something else in life, which we refer to as "satisfaction." They seek only to be at peace with themselves. There is a saying in the Gospel from Jesus that was later much considered by the sages after him. Of course, in the Far East, a similar saying exists in the words of Buddha, and mystics have also greatly emphasized it, and that saying is: "Do not behave in such a way that your house becomes divided into several rooms against itself." These [people of satisfaction] are those who do not want the house of their being to become multi-roomed, but rather want to have an integrated existence. That is, they always want to be at peace with themselves. They do not want to be perceived outwardly as wealthy or powerful or any of those seven things at all. Rather, they only want to live in such a way that they are at peace and reconciliation with themselves. Because one can be separated from anyone, but one cannot be separated from oneself. So they do not want their house to be divided against itself into several rooms, with this room in conflict with that room. They do not want their house to be like houses where one room cannot be entered due to extreme heat, and another room cannot be entered due to extreme cold. They want to have an integrated house and, as psychologists say, for their existence not to become compartmentalized, celled, or roomed. Does a human being's existence become roomed? This second group believes that the first group's existence will inevitably become roomed. Those who pursue success will inevitably have their existence become roomed. Why? Because for that success, they engage in actions and have concerns and sorrows for reaching their goal that compartmentalize their existence.

At least four large rooms emerge in the existence of those [people of success]:

1. The room of regret; regret over why I did not use that opportunity that arose to buy land. Regret over why I did not use that situation that arose to obtain that position and office. Regret is always a state experienced by someone who, in their own estimation, has not utilized a blessing, has missed an opportunity or a possibility.
2. The room of sorrow; in the sense that the person says, my work did not lead to success. I wanted to become rich through this path, but I went bankrupt. I wanted to obtain that position, but my rival obtained it. Sorrow arises when I feel that the matter has ended in failure.
3. The room of remorse; remorse is when I feel that in order to achieve success, I made a calculative error somewhere. I committed a mistake.
4. The Room of Fear; when I am a person of success, all of you are my hurdles. You have seen hurdling races, where to get from one point to another, one must leap over forty obstacles. Well, when I want to become a minister, I must leap over five hundred obstacles. And each of these obstacles instills fear in my heart. I say, perhaps I have overcome 520 obstacles, but when I want to overcome the fifty-first, I might fall and fail to pass it.

So, what do these four states do to your being? They compartmentalize your being, room by room. That is, a person afflicted with regret, sorrow, remorse, and fear is not at peace with themselves. For instance, in remorse, they say to themselves, 'Woe is me! I shouldn't have calculated this way; I should have calculated that way. Why didn't you act correctly and properly?' This person is in conflict with themselves. One cannot have these four states unless these four states are the very state of their conflict with themselves. In regret, you say to yourself: 'Woe is me! That opportunity came, how did you let it slip away?' and so on. Thus, these individuals are not at peace with themselves internally. Now, whether they succeed externally—becoming a great wealthy or powerful person, a great university professor, and attaining what their hearts desired—or not, in any case, they are in conflict with themselves within.

This second group says, we do not want this conflict. We want there to be no regret, sorrow, or remorse within us, and instead, we want to have an integrated being where peace, joy, hope, and tranquility prevail. Therefore, their way of life is to calculate the necessities of life and see what things are truly essential. That is, if I do not have them, I can no longer continue my life at all. These necessities consist of: food and drink to a certain extent, clothing to a certain extent, shelter to a certain extent, sleep, rest, recreation, and the satisfaction of the sexual instinct. But all of these are necessary only to a very minimal degree. They pursue this and free themselves from every comparison and competition, and then the rest of their lives are spent ensuring that this inner equilibrium is not disturbed and that this peace they have with themselves does not turn into a civil war. In other words, they want to make peace with oneself the goal in life, not success. These people become integrated. Psychologists call such a person someone who has integrity. In our literature, integrity is also interpreted as single-mindedness. That is, the entire being of a person plays one tune, not that every corner of their being plays a different tune. These people's greatest motto regarding life's necessities is 'Contentment'; which was in that ghazal. Firstly, they no longer concern themselves with non-essentials. They no longer care about fame, popularity, academic knowledge, or anything else. They only care about necessities, and these necessities are only about contentment. We call contentment the combination of two things: one is 'joy in what one has,' and the other is 'not looking at what one lacks.' That is, for a person to be happy with what they have and not look around to see what other things exist that they do not have. This is why, in this type of mystical view, contentment becomes so important.

Well, now you might say, if this happens and if all people are like this, will culture, civilization, and progress then be achieved? No. They will not be achieved at all. But do not worry about that at all. Because people will never reach a point where you need to be concerned that the caravan of human culture and civilization will stop. Establish this peace within yourself and do not say, 'But what if everyone does this...?' This 'if' is an 'if' that will never, ever be realized. The majority of people pursue success, and therefore the wheel of the world will never stop and will keep turning. This is the same concept that Rumi spoke of, that there are furnace-stokers in the world; do not worry about the bathhouse furnace-stokers. Just enter the bathhouse, wash yourself, become clean and pure, and come out. These people of success are the furnace-stokers of the world; whether they know it or not. We must be those who come into this bathhouse and simply use the warm water that these furnace-stokers have provided. Therefore, we use airplanes and telephones, and you should never say that if the words of mystics and sages were accepted, we would have neither airplanes nor anything else, and it will never be so. We must attend to ourselves in this situation.

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[1] . Transcribed and edited by: Ms. Kheiri

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Audio of Mostafa Malekian's lecture titled "Success or Satisfaction; Integrity or Self-Betrayal?!"

PDF file of Mostafa Malekian's lecture titled "Success or Satisfaction; Integrity or Self-Betrayal?!"

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Mostafa Malekian's lecture titled "Success or Satisfaction; Integrity or Self-Betrayal?!"

Source of text and audio file: Mostafa Malekian's Telegram channel

January 2014

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