The Effectiveness of Cognitive Behavioral Counseling in Resolving a Case of Romantic Failure

Abstract

One of the fundamental problems in adolescence and young adulthood is the issue of individuals' intense emotional attachments to another person without understanding the reasons for them, and the rising divorce rates resulting from marriages entered into without knowledge of the other party's characteristics, due to reliance on intense emotional feelings. The aim of this study is to examine the effectiveness of cognitive behavioral counseling in resolving a case of romantic failure. The client was a 25-year-old male, a second-semester master's student named M_– T, who, after expressing his problem regarding the severance of a relationship with his beloved in the fifth semester of his bachelor's degree, had since considered himself a failure and worthless, and whose decline in academic performance since that time had worried him. The design of this study is of the qualitative research type and a single-case study method with multiple baselines. Also, the assessment tools used to examine the client's condition before the sessions and to measure the effectiveness of the intervention after the counseling sessions were the following tests: (Coopersmith Self-Esteem Inventory, Dysfunctional Attitudes Scale (DAS), Depression Anxiety Stress Scales (DASS), and Hatfield's Passionate Love Scale). After conducting 12 counseling sessions with a cognitive behavioral approach, the sessions concluded. The results showed that the sessions had a significant impact on reducing the client's dysfunctional beliefs, anxiety, and depression, and on increasing his self-esteem, adjustment, and improving his psychological state.

One of the most important reasons for individuals seeking help at treatment centers is problems in romantic relationships; among the deficiencies in these relationships is the issue of emotional maturity, which, if not dealt with appropriately, can create many problems (Behzadi, 1389). Students today are more exposed to mental health problems than in the past, which seems to be related to their personality traits (Sharkin, 2006, translated by Yaghoubi et al., 1390). Also, Horowitz¹ (1979) believes that failure to achieve satisfaction in romantic relationships is linked to many neurotic discomforts that lead to outpatient visits to treatment centers. One of the fundamental emotions when losing someone one loves is sadness and distress, combined with feelings such as anger; in fact, normal distress should noticeably decrease after a period of less than 6 months due to adaptation to new conditions or receiving support from others. Only a small group experiences prolonged grief and encounters problems in two areas: first, distress from separation, and second, cognitive, behavioral, and emotional symptoms (Rosner et al.², 2011). Prigerson³ (2009) has presented a number of symptoms for chronic grief, which include the following: 1) Sorrow and sadness. 2) Distress from separation, which itself has several symptoms including: automatic thoughts related to the lost relationship, deep feelings of sadness, pain, and distress stemming from the lost relationship, and yearning for the lost person. 3) Cognitive, behavioral, and emotional symptoms including: role confusion in life and decreased self-esteem, difficulty accepting the loss, avoidance of reminders of the loss, decreased trust in others, anger, reduced emotions and activity in life, feelings of emptiness and meaninglessness. 4) Creating a predisposition for disorders such as major depression, generalized anxiety, and post-traumatic stress.

Hatfield and Rapson⁴ (2002) define passionate love as an intense feeling and abundant desire for something, accompanied by a close connection to emotions such as pleasure, distress, anger, fear, and jealousy. Also, social psychologists describe the experience of love for secure individuals as an experience filled with positive emotions, which is contrary to insecure individuals, for whom the experience of significant stress in their intimate relationships leads to interpersonal problems. Although, according to Hatfield and Rapson (2002), if this passionate love is mutual, the mental health of both parties is not greatly threatened, its one-sidedness leads to the formation of negative feelings and serious problems in intimate relationships. In contrast to this type of love is compassionate love, which is characterized by a calming state, intimacy, commitment, and attachment.

1. Horowitz

Rosner

3. Prigerson

4. Hatfield & Rapson

According to Reik¹ (1972), when individuals are not in a good state, when their self-esteem has diminished, when they are frightened or anxious and their lives are difficult and in distressing conditions, they are more likely to fall into a love relationship, and the result of non-union in these individuals is a feeling of failure rather than normal and transient distress. Also, numerous studies indicate that both children and adolescents, when under conditions of anxiety and stress, have a particularly strong tendency to be drawn into romantic relationships (Reik, 1972). Sternberg² (1988) also states that, based on various studies, passionate love is extinguished by time; this may allude to the old proverb that "union is the grave of love," which holds true when love is passionate love and a kind of idolizing the beloved and having an abnormal affection for them. Therefore, given the high scores for anxiety and depression and the low score for self-esteem, how the current client became entangled in an intense and passionate love relationship and a severe dependence on romantic relationships is justifiable. In recent years, it has been observed that cognitive behavioral therapy has broad applicability for treating various mental disorders (Holmes³et al., 2002). According to the cognitive model of Beck⁴ et al. (1990) regarding personality disorders, environment and childhood experiences, as predisposing factors of temperament and genetically and biologically predetermined factors, lead to the formation of distorted cognitive, emotional, motivational, and behavioral schemas in adulthood, and these distorted schemas, in turn, form important and destructive beliefs about oneself and others, which lead to the formation of underdeveloped and extreme behavioral strategies.

Behavioral therapy has not achieved remarkable success in treating disorders such as depression, inadequacy, and lack of self-esteem, which are more the result of internal thought processes than environmental conditions. On the other hand, the integrated cognitive-behavioral approach has been more effective than behavioral and cognitive therapies alone. Research has shown that the cognitive-behavioral approach has been more successful in treating individuals with generalized anxiety, panic, depression, and low self-esteem (Wallis⁵, 2002).

What had brought the client to counseling sessions were problems such as: (mental preoccupation with the other party after three years, inability to control anger when facing tension, feelings of worthlessness and meaninglessness). Of course, according to the client, before this relationship, he had also had an intense interest in another person, which was forgotten with the appearance of the second. And in response to the possibility of forgetting the recent case with the emergence of a new one, his answer was also positive, and this indicates that his problem

1. Wallis

2. Sternberg

3. Holmes

4. Beck

5. Reik

is not wanting a specific person, but stems from an emotional void and a search for affection to fill a deficiency, in which family problems and the turmoil of the family atmosphere have not been without influence. The aim of this research was to examine the effectiveness of cognitive behavioral therapy in improving a 25-year-old male client with romantic failure, where the treatment focused on the client's self-esteem, anxiety, depression, dysfunctional attitudes, and passionate love.

Research Method

It is a qualitative design and a single-case study method with multiple baselines. Treatment duration: 12 sessions of 90 minutes, with visits once a week. At the end of the 12 counseling sessions, the client was tested again. And after a period of one and a half months (45 days), he was tested again to follow up on the intervention results. The data presented in the chart in Figure 1 relates to the comparison of the first session, the last session, and the follow-up of the cognitive behavioral counseling session.

Instruments

Coopersmith Self-Esteem Inventory: Coopersmith has shown the reliability of this test to be 0.88 and its validity to be 0.7. Also, to examine the Coopersmith self-esteem test, two methods of Cronbach's alpha and split-half have been used (Nazari and Hosseinpour, 2008). The reliability coefficient using the split-half method and Spearman-Brown correction was equal to 0.83, and in the study by Majdian et al., through Cronbach's alpha in a group of 50 people, it was obtained as 0.81 (Majdian et al., 2009).

Dysfunctional Attitude Scale (DAS): This scale, which has five subscales, includes 40 items for determining attitudes and predisposing attitudes to depression, which is constructed based on Beck's cognitive theory, and its validity and reliability have been estimated by means of a sample including 2023 outpatients who had referred for cognitive therapy, and satisfactory coefficients have also been obtained (Beck, Brown, Steer & Weissman¹, 1991).

Depression Anxiety Stress Scales (DASS): which measures the levels of anxiety, depression, and stress. In the study by Sahebi (2005), the correlation between the DASS depression subscale and the Beck Depression Inventory was 0.70, the DASS anxiety subscale and the Zung Anxiety Scale was 0.67, and the stress subscale and the Perceived Stress Scale was 0.49.

Hatfield Passionate Love Scale: which includes 15 items and the method of responding to it is on a 9-point Likert scale, chosen from 1 to 9, where each person specifies their level of agreement with the statements on this continuum. The reliability of this scale, using Cronbach's alpha coefficient, was calculated as 0.82 by Rafiee Nia and Asghari (2007).

1. Beck & Steer & Weissman

Findings, Discussion, and Conclusion

The results obtained from the oral interview and the tests showed that cognitive-behavioral counseling was effective in improving the subject's psychological state in the 4 target areas. Ultimately, using techniques such as increasing self-awareness of thoughts and symptoms and the dangerous emotional void that, disguised as love, can make her dependent on anyone, teaching anger management skills, regular de-stressing, and starting an exercise program to reduce depressed mood and anxiety and increase morale, overcoming irrational thoughts such as ((halal affection is the solution to all problems)), positive thinking and expressing and believing in the positive points of her personality and life, and increasing self-esteem through this, changing the view and thoughts towards those who harmed her in her life and childhood considering their unawareness, and learning from and discovering the positive impact of these experiences in her current and future life, the client's adjustment increased and relative improvement emerged.

Figure 1: Results of test scores separated by first and last session and follow-up.

Therefore, the results can be examined based on six areas:

Magnitude of Change

The research results indicate a significant change from the cognitive-behavioral intervention on the 4 target areas of treatment. And the reduction of anxiety and depression, passionate love, and dysfunctional thoughts, and the increase in self-esteem are indicative of this matter.

Generality of Change (Percentage of Changes)

Overall improvement at the end in the areas of anxiety and depression, dysfunctional thoughts, self-esteem, and passionate love shows 62, 45, 59, and 47 percent change, respectively, which in the follow-up phase changed to 47, 45, 19, and 61 percent.

Generality of Change

As observed overall, in terms of the generality of changes, cognitive behavioral counseling succeeded in achieving changes of 62%, 45%, 59%, and 47% in anxiety, dysfunctional thoughts, self-esteem, and passionate love at the final session, and changes of 47%, 45%, 19%, and 61% at follow-up. This indicates the efficacy of this therapeutic approach in the general improvement of the client's problems.

Acceptability

In this study, the subject was a 25-year-old male client who, given his limited information about himself and the problem, and the appeal of cognitive behavioral therapy, attended all sessions, and no issues arose regarding subject attrition.

Safety of Change

The results of the client's verbal feedback on the therapy and the tests at the final session and follow-up indicate the effect of the intervention in improving the key parameters related to and involved in the client's romantic failure problem.

Stability

The enduring nature of the effects of cognitive behavioral interventions, due to their educational, homework-oriented, self-help, and self-regulatory aspects for the client, showed that the results at the final session not only did not diminish at follow-up but also showed a relative increase.

Acknowledgments

In conclusion, the author extends thanks and appreciation for the valuable guidance of Dr. Mohammad Khodayarifard and Dr. Ahmad Amani in the implementation and advancement of this work.

References

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The Effectiveness of Cognitive Behavioral Counseling in Resolving a Case of Romantic Failure

Authors:

Mohsen Babaei Garmkhani

Mohammad Khodayarifard

Ahmad Amani

Source: Ravanpedia

Abstract

1. Horowitz

Rosner